What addicts get are relief from pain” Dr. Gabor Mate

When I was 23 I had my wisdom teeth removed and was prescribed a powerful opioid Percocet. When that script ran out, I was scared. I didn’t like going back to ‘me’.

I LOVED who I had become while ‘high’. You see we don’t know about trauma and the pain body. We only know about fighting our own selves with the weapon of shame.

You shouldn’t be so attached to that feeling, Anita. You shouldn’t desire something so harmful. What the hell is wrong with you?!?

I didnt’ know until about two years ago – when a friend said “Ohhhh, that was your first taste of freedom from the demons of your mind”. Why yes, how did you know?

How did I not know?

We do not know or understand ourselves. We are patterned for survival and thriving is not even in our daydreams I mean who is thriving? Movie stars and music makers? Finally their shadow is allover for us to see that their inner demons have been driving their addictions into the darkest places imaginable– human trafficking and sexual child abuse.

Do not look ‘out there’ for the answers my friends. The answers lie within the human heart. Do not even look ‘out there’ to judge. Let God be the judge…may we find our power sweeping our side of the street.

You will find the crack your demons have been feeding on and you will starve them. This is necessary.

Do not feel sorry for them. Let Christ throw them into the pigs who dive into the sea because they know their time is up.

Everyone has a pain body. You are not special– that is the worst and best news I can share.

Because what is special has yet to be expressed.

The hardest part will be when you enter creation mode and make stuff to satisfy your own Self. It might be shared or not.

It’s about being a creator now.

The shift in the nervous system is from consumer

to supplier.

You supply your hungry ghost with nourishment and love in the

form of creativity., connection and being an eye witness. You no longer look away into your addiction–

you take a good hard look at the pain and you create capacity

to feel it.

That

is

freedom

And you must want ti. Jesus comes for the sick, the poor in spirit and desperate. that was me…still is me some days.

Like today.